Sick

Sick and reflective. What is my damage and what is my point? So hard to talk to anyone, ever. I could write and try to express things I care about, but I can't divorce that from the urge to ingratiate and make the friends I lack.  What to do? Should I continue on Twitter? Interact more? Less? Not at all? Give up social media? Read a fucking book again? Talk to people in real life and see what happens? So many of my problems are about not being able to communicate, and so many of the world's problems are not hearing the right things communicated the right way. Just struggling to find ways to address both wants, and failing. I wish I had some sort of interlocutor to address the high and the low, the big picture of our self-destructive greedy world and the small picture of a terrified but amiable middle-aged man with some pretentions to good ideas and no bedside manner. Thanks for listening to more babble. Maybe I'll talk more often.